Warning: This review has spoilers a-plenty!!

Much has been said about repressed sexuality embeddedin horror films. The stabbing of phallic knifes in uncountable slasher films, sex being equated with death, and other such nonsense. The American The Ring franchise is an original in that the films deliver an important social message about people just like the intended audience; you.

It should be widely known by now that the true morality tale of The Ring was that of copyright infringements and illegal duplication of movies. The images on the cursed videotape in The Ring are dubiously edited without final credits on the film, unlabeled and illegally distributed. It only makes sense that by watching this tape, the characters are involving themselves a crime. Not only that, but they see that the real victims (Samara and her stepmother) are the ones who "really" suffer. By not being compensated for their roles as actors in this film, Samara's poor depressed stepmother nose-dives off a cliff and Samara becomes criminally insane. She transcends her VHS cassette prison to act as the ultimate judge of fate. But it really should come as no surprise; the FBI has warned you of this very thing for over two decades.

The Ring Two is much more personal. The main plot has Rachel, the mother from the first film, destroying the tape, and thus ending the "ring" of terror. But in doing so, the terror is forced back on to her and her son. All of that is, of course, just mainstream rubbish that cleverly disguises the real message. It actually deals primarily with the story of a very poor, troubled child. His woes of puberty, self-identity and sexual confusion are quite literally a part of the whole experience. If The Ring was a two-hour FBI warning, The Ring Two is an ABC After-School Special of the Week.

David Dorfman reprises his role as Aidan Keller, the youngest film pirate in history. Escaping unscathed for his crimes, he begins the descent into puberty and madness. Looking around the tender age of 12, Aidan has taken to photography as a hobby and seems to be quite a healthy lad. But one night our pale hero awakes after having a dream about Samara (Kelly Stables), his "dream girl from the original unmarked videocassette." (I can relate. I also had a dream girl from an unmarked cassette at his age; I used to keep it under my bed.) His dream consists of Samara, already dripping wet, forcing herself upon him. As he wakes up from this "wet dream" his sheets are stained and the first thing he sees is the sight of his mother, Rachel Keller (Naomi Watts).

Aidan's relationship with his mother Rachel is a very accurate representation of Freud's classic Oedipal Complex. She is truly a very beautiful woman. In fact, because of his attraction to his mother, he cannot even refer to her as such. He insists upon calling her by her first name, much to her dismay. This places her and Samara in sexual competition with each other. Samara wins the first round because, in a reversal of standard sexism, he accepts her into himself. As a result, he "becomes" female and sees most of the remainder of the film from a feminine perspective. But he has still the body of a male boy, which really makes things confusing for him. At one point he is instructed by his mother to prepare to bathe. He stubbornly refuses to remove his underpants and do as instructed. Is this because his mother is present and even offered "to get in first" or because a male character is standing in the same room in this scene? Perhaps it is because he likes "being a dirty boy/girl." The film smartly leaves it to its audience to determine the meaning behind this scene; very avant-garde for an American film.

His conflicting sexual feelings eventually force Rachel to confront Samara. Samara can become real only by being reborn into Rachel. It only makes sense that the final battle resides in the well with the "ring" opening. This is symbolic imagery is comparable to a vaginal opening leading deep into the birth canal of the well. As Samara attempts to be birthed, Rachel, playing the role of concerned mother, seals off the opening as if to further illustrate the dangers of penetrating the well. "Abstinence is key" is the message she delivers to her son. The disease metaphor is also present by portraying Samara as "a filthy creature of the well", quite literally by making her walk much like a "crab" out of the cavity. Finally, Rachel states, "I am not your fucking mother!" in a manner that both Samara and Aiden can hear. This dialog is brilliant as she is dually stating to Samara that she will not be birthed by her, and to Aidan that a mother is not intended to be the object of lust.

In the end Aidan returns to normal, quite like most children do after overcoming the awkwardness of pubescence. But the emotional rollercoaster of The Ring Two is a fantastic vehicle to deliver such a poignant message as the bond of trust between mother and son, and the reasons you stay away from nasty bitches. By being sugarcoated and fed to us as an average horror film, most will miss this aspect with only one viewing. But with hope, their subconscious might pick up on the finer and less obvious details that they can then use in their daily lives.

Presentation
The Ring Two is presented in an unrated format and in anamorphic OAR. The video is surprisingly grainy. It isn’t unwatchable, but it is not something that you will be using to show off your high-def to your buddies. At least a few scenes at the county fair are extended from the theatrical presentation. And you can see a very subtle shift in color. It isn’t very obvious, but I am sure videophiles will notice right away. I’m pretty disappointed to not be able to pick out much of what has been added, but there is certainly an uneventful 19 minutes added to the original running time. Sadly, Dreamworks, for whatever reason, did not include the theatrical presentation, which could have easily been done using seamless branching.

They also didn’t include a DTS track, which the original film had. Unsurprisingly though, the DD 5.1 track is no slouch. Music is key to establishing mood in a horror flick, and while The Ring Two doesn’t excel as its predecessor did, Zimmer’s score is awesome all the same. A DD 2.0 track is also included.

Subtitles are available in English, Spanish, and French. Additionally, the special features are subtitled for the convenience of those with hearing difficulties. Dreamworks should be given praise for this.

Extras
Walter Parkes Introduces Rings – (0:48)
This extra is pretty self-explanatory. Mr. Parks is the producer of both American Ring films. He introduces the short film Rings. In doing so, he pretty much tells you everything that you would learn by watching it. So, maybe it would have been a better extra if Mr. Parks would have just shut the fuck up.

Rings – (16:38) This short film was previously released as a bonus disc. This disc was packaged with The Ring DVD and released on the eve of the sequel’s theatrical debut. Not being crazed enough to re-purchase a DVD I already owned, I Netflixed the bonus disc at the time. Surprisingly, this short film is excellent. It serves to add on to the legend set forth in The Ring that many people know about the tape. Some “circles” knowingly watch it in what resembles a combination of gang-initiation, cultism, and on the most primal level drug addiction. In short, they do it to catch the buzz. Think along the lines of Russian roulette with the high effect of cocaine. You got the picture. Well acted, beautifully shot, and there is more going on in the main attraction. It does fit in the continuity of the series, and is highly recommended. Even if the movie is not.

Faces of Fear: The Phenomenon – (6:12) Short promo piece which features actress Naomi Watts, effects master Rick Baker (see Gremlins), director Hideo Nakata, producers Laurie MacDonald & Walter F. Parkes, actor Simon Baker and pre-pubescent son-of-a-bitch David Dorfman. David has fantastic things like this to say, “Before I did Ring, I was starting to think the horror genre was getting a little out of style… if you know what I mean.” Yeah, David. I do. You are a punk ass brat that can’t act. “The last really great horror movie was The Shining”. Right… because you were even BORN then. Anyway, the first three minutes of this thankfully short featurette is devoted to discussing why the first film was great. Which it was. The second half is meaningless promo material for the sequel. The best part is you get to hear Watts’ authentic accent, which is very sexy. Nothing else to see though; move along.

Fear on Film: Special Effects – (5:44) Pete Chesney, the special effects coordinator on the sequel, takes you through how they did the well sequence, the deer sequence, and the water sequence. Naomi Watts, Hideo Nakata stunt coordinator Keith Campbell and visual effects supervisor Betsy Paterson also put in their two cents. Highlights include Betsy telling us that it would be impossible to train real deer to run into cars. Fascinating! Much more informative is the water sequence. A great deal went into it, and I found that bit of interest.

Samara: From Eye to Action – (5:47) The already-expected usual suspects (Nakata, Parkes, and Baker) this time joined by writer Ehren Kruger discuss broad view of everything Samara is. They discuss everything from the make-ups to the character herself. Nakata is the main participant since he has knowledge of the character (has directed the character several times in the original Japanese Ringu series, where the character is called Sadako). Too many pats on the backs make this documentary mostly worthless.

The Ring: The Power of Symbols – (5:19) Mirrors, the Burning Tree, Water and of course Deer all get deconstructed for the audience. If you are the type of person who needs things spelled out, I can help you. W-A-S-T-E O-F T-I-M-E.

HBO First Look: The Making of The Ring Two – (13:00) Fuck me silly if the OTHER features weren’t promotional enough, but this one is the biggest fluff piece of the set. It is your typical HBO advance look that they do for every movie with a budget of more than $14. But hey, if you are a fan I guess it’s kinda cool. Everyone participates, and they seem to be happy with their work. Naomi’s accent returns, and that always makes me happy. There is some new info, but too much is reused from the mini-docs that I ultimately feel cheated by this.

Deleted Scenes – (18:35) Introducing deleted character extraordinaire, Mrs. Breyer. After a RIVETING experience of sofa shopping with Aiden, their new neighbor swings by for a visit and makes herself at home. Another scene has an extended back-and-forth between Rachel and Max. Rachel interviews Aiden’s babysitter and following that is a very cool establishing of atmosphere that SHOULD have been in the film. One of Rachel’s writers tries to have an article printed on the videotape. Aiden sees a fake deer. We get to hear some more about Max’s past, not that it amounts to much. There are several more meaningless scenes that were not needed and obviously cut for time – even though they are only seconds long. Ten scenes in all, but only one is worth it. All are non-anamorphic widescreen, with the time codes still burned-in.

Production Notes - Most people don’t read these things, but I always tend to. Surprisingly, what is usually reserved for copied IMDB bios is instead 82 (!) pages of information that is exactly what it should be – informative! Whether you are a fan or just seriously interested in production and factoids, I recommend reading this.

Cast Biographies - Here are those IMDB-style bios. Eight in all – Naomi Watts, Simon Baker, David Dorfman, Sissy Spacek, Elizabeth Perkins, Gary Cole, Emily Vancamp, and Kelly Stables.

Filmmaker Biographies - More of the same, for the men behind the camera. Fifteen in all – Hideo Nakata, Walter F. Parkes, Laurie MacDonald, Ehren Kruger, Mike Mancari, Roy Lee, Neil Machlis, Michele Weisler, Gabriel Beristain, Jim Bissell, Wendy Chuck, Michael N. Knue, Hans Zimmer, Rick Baker, and Pete Chesney. (Whew!)

Previews - Here are the requisite theatrical trailers for The Island and the almost guaranteed to suck Carlito’s Way: Rise to Power. Also you get DVD trailers for Gladiator – Extended Edition, The Interpreter, and Unleashed. Lucky you. Sadly, no trailers for The Ring Two.

EASTER EGG BONUS! – (1:08) If you press “right” when the cursor is highlighting the “Return” arrow on the second page of bonus features you will highlight a question mark. Selecting it will give you a time-lapse video of Kelly Stables being transformed into Samara by the make-up team. Cute bonus!

FIN
In case you didn’t pick up on the sarcasm in my review, it was just that. The Ring Two is a poor film, made even poorer by being a follow-up to one of the greatest horror films of the decade. The old adage that you can’t polish a turd lives on, as this unrated DVD doesn’t offer much of an improvement. Even the features are mind-bogglingly average. While the sequel does offer a few good ideas and attempts to do something different, overall it’s simply mundane. I think the problem is with the director. Hideo Nakata has an eye for this sort of film, but he has no understanding of the script. Where Gore Verbinski’s original took a silly premise and made it believable, packed in great chemistry, and a story that had few holes, the sequel is just a melting pot of great ingredients that would be better served on another dish.

If you have more than a passing interest in the film, I would strongly urge you rent it. As it stands, this DVD is only for the most hardcore fans of the franchise, and insatiable completists.

The non-DVD related elements of this review were taken from my original review of the theatrical release located here.