Eric Preston
I, like most of you, was born to two white people that now hate each other. I was raised by The Flintstones and Three's Company reruns. I have developed a healthy hatred of organized religion and republicans. I am very clean and uncircumcised. My current dream is to have a 3-way with Alyssa Milano and Jessica Alba. I have begun every sentence with the words 'I' or 'my' which I find completely annoying, and so should you. I used to be good looking, but now I'm 33. My favorite beer is Sam Adams because I'm from Massachusetts. Intolerant people piss me off. Yoda is really George Lucas. Steven Spielberg would be a great film maker if he was European. The only thing that pisses me off more then Stanley Kubrick not wanting his films released in anamorphic widescreen is that he's dead. I'm married. The first book I remember memorizing was The B Book, followed by Top of the Pizzas. I wrote this at work. I enjoy arguing with middle aged Wal-Mart employees.